Equal

I don’t want to go deep into the topic, but it can’t be avoided. I’ve been running the stories for the past five days regarding the Supreme Court and the cases it’s currently taking on. I’ve read all the Facebook posts and seen all the images. Honestly it’s all nauseating. 

I will say it loud and clear (or type it in a font you can read): I do not support gay marriages. 

How dare you accuse me of being close-minded, judgmental, or hateful. I’d rather sit down and have a real conversation about the topic. I’ll hear your side of the story. I don’t need to spout off one-liners and shove my reasoning down your throat. That’s the last thing I want to do. But please don’t be offended when I stick to my convictions.

I do believe in love. I totally support love. That’s why I choose to handle this situation with love. Please don’t tell me you’re fighting for Love Equality by bashing people who don’t see eye to eye. There are arguments on both sides. 

I stick to what is in the Bible. It’s an issue that is talked about and is outlawed. It’s not just something that’s frowned upon. God says no. So that’s where I stand. I do not believe you can be a true follower of God and continue down the path of homosexuality. But I want you to know something, God loves everyone. And that’s an equality I stand behind. 

Changing the definition of marriage is a slippery slope. Which is probably why all of the coverage and people’s comments make me sick. There is a lot at stake. 

Enough of that. In other, yet tangentially related news, I learned something about cricket mating the other night. Apparently the female cricket injects her eggs into the ground. The male comes along afterward and fertilizes them. I learned this after asking if someone breeds frogs. No, but crickets… Good to know.

Please lay down your arrows, for they’re sure to pierce the skin.
And water from a broken well will make you thirst again.
It’s worth it brothers, it’s worth it friends,

To know your maker, to lose your sin.
Did you know that you are dearly loved?
–Jimmy Needham

Weak

I hate getting emotional. Don’t get me wrong. There’s a time and a place. What I’m referring to is the situation where you probably shouldn’t take something to heart, yet it still slices deep. 

I found myself staring blankly ahead, elbows on my desk, hands squeezing my head like a vice, repeating, “You don’t treat people like that.” 

You don’t. 

And now I’m dwelling on it, my body shuddering, trying to choke down the sobs. 

It’s great that you came to tell me your frustrations. Equally awful that you left in a storm. Why couldn’t we have a civilized conversation? Instead I’m left in shambles because I take it personally. If you could have just told me it was a problem that you’d like to see addressed, I could do something about it or explain to you where I’m coming from. Maybe then we could figure out a happy medium. 

But no, you go on as if nothing happened. Steamrolling people is banal, definitely typical behavior. 

I hate that I get worked up about it, to the point that I can’t have this discussion without you feeling like you’ve won because I’m weak. I’m not weak; I’m human. 

Grow up and do your job. I refuse to walk on eggshells around you. It’s not fair. This is the real world. You don’t treat people like that. Don’t harp on me about being professional. It was really classy when you walked away saying you weren’t going to do your job anymore. 

With that I’m done. I’ll have this conversation and I won’t cry. I’ll suck it up and be professional. I’m not going to let you belittle me and get away with it. 

I appreciate the note left for me. “Don’t let it get you down. Every day is a new day. Chin up!” It’s true. I’m not going to let it get me down. I’m bigger than that. I will hold my head high. I’m moving on.

I hear the tone in your voice. You see that look in my eyes. I think you’re missing the point. You think I’ve lost my mind
I don’t care who started this. Drop the attitude. You don’t have to win. It’s not me against you. We can start again.
–Fireflight

Pizza Party

Today felt like one of those Fridays in middle school where you walked into class and saw the tv cart. Yeah, that feeling. Throw in the fact that your class won a pizza party for some team spirit competition–and today’s the day. Add to that the joy of getting to spend the last half hour of the day playing silent ball sitting on top of your desk. Yeah, you know what I’m talking about: that kind of day.

There really wasn’t anything special about today. Nothing that stood out as particularly magnificent. A bunch of little things molded it into something good though. 

Cheap coffee on my way to work because it’s Biggby’s birthday. Hope it’s great, I’ll take two! 

Ice cube trays hidden. No worries. I found them. And filled them. 🙂

Breaking news at 5 o’clock? We’ll have a crew there some time after 5:30? Sure, I’ll throw that live shot in my show. Along with the other one. The great thing is that it was flawless. Sometimes everything just works. 

Pizza in the break room. I love the sound of those five words. My smile when I investigate and find Pizza Hut–even bigger.

No drama in the newsroom. Just a relaxing night at work, getting things done.

I baked a cake and brought most of it to work so that I don’t eat it all on my days off. So being able to share that made me happy. I think the best part was giving a piece to my EP and having him storm back into the newsroom demanding more. 

So it was a four day week. I guess I had more energy. Or less to care about. But it was good. 

It truly feels like the calm before the storm. I know it’s going to get crazy soon with people leaving. I’ll probably end up working extra hours and added responsibilities. So for now I’m going to enjoy these moments. I’m thankful for the time I’ve had in this journey and for what I’ve learned. I’m sure there will be frustration, but that can only be looked at as a challenge to overcome. I’m not going to let it get to me. I’m not going to preoccupy myself with two weeks from now.

I gotta find my place, I wanna hear my sound; don’t care about all the pain in front of me ’cause I’m just trying to be happy.

–Leona Lewis

Feud

I’m currently feuding with someone at work. Not sure who it is, but there’s definitely something going down. If the person knew what he/she is dealing with, I think they’d give it a rest. “What” referring to my ridiculous addiction.

For some unforeseeable reason, a co-worker finds it necessary to remove the ice cube trays from the freezer. Yes, there is an ice maker in the freezer. There’s also a bin to store up lots of ice. So for that person, it probably doesn’t make sense as to why there would be addition vessels for ice production. The problem, however, is that said ice maker does not function consistently. It can’t be relied on! I use the extra two trays to supplement what the machine makes.

I doubt the person who’s removing my trays (notice the possessiveness!) has a good reason for doing it. But now it’s a battle. It’s happened a couple times recently where I come in and the trays are gone. I grab them from the cupboard, fill them, and voila! Ice. I came into work yesterday and the trays were hidden behind a roll of cups. Like that’s going to stop me. When I came in today, the trays were not in the freezer, nor were they in the cupboard. I found them in another cubby over by the microwaves.

I really just want to get in this person’s head. I want his/her reaction when he/she sees the trays in the freezer. I’m considering a hidden camera.

I’m usually eating a big cupful of ice right now, but because the ice maker sucks and my trays weren’t filled, I’m ice-less. It’s sad.

I want my foe to see this sad face.

I know you’re upset and that you’re happy just to sit and hate me, but I’ll make a bet that you’ll be better to forget about me. Even better yet I’ll let a little light melt the ice, ice baby!

–Lights

Backdrop

Jason and Todd were my heroes today. One of them drives a white truck.

I was taught a valuable lesson today. I learned my car is not as big as I think it is. Also I’m definitely a girl and should have a warning sticker on my forehead when checking out at hardware stores.

Before heading out grocery shopping I got this great idea to be crafty. I’ve wanted to make some backdrops for my photography for quite a while. I’ve read some blogs, watched some videos… I knew what I was doing. All I had to do was buy this polystyrene(?) stuff and paint it. Voila! Instant lightweight backdrop. So i got the foam and added a sheet of tile board to my cart, making my way to the paint department. The lady there talked me through all of my options, got me hooked up with some primer, a fantastic shade of pink paint, and a brush. I grabbed a drop cloth and proceeded to check out. Seventy-some dollars later I’m rolling my cart out the doors when the guy walking out at the same time says, “I hope you’re not trying to put that in a small car.” Oh no, it should fit. Why wouldn’t it? He said he’d help me load it, but there’s no way this 4×9 sheet is fitting in my cruiser. Nuh-uh. Leaning up against his car, he asked if I was going far. Not really, just a mile down the road. Oh, well that’s too bad. I’d help you out, but I’m not going that way. So I’m standing next to my cart, blankly staring at my phone trying to figure out who I know in the Lansing area with a truck. Ugh. I hate not knowing anyone.

These two guys come walking out of the store. One says, “Well that looks problematic.” So I then launch into my “i’m a dumb girl” speech. They ask if I’m going far. Nope, just a mile down the road. They put my stuff in their truck, say they’ll follow me, joke about me going too fast and losing them and consequently my boards. They get to my apartment and carry my stuff in and downstairs. I ask if there’s anything I can do for them, give them. They just smiled and said, “Pass it on.” I thanked them profusely as they walked out. That encounter really made my day. They were so kind. So now I’m looking for a way to repay that. I know that it probably wasn’t a huge ordeal for them. It took all of 10 minutes out of their day, but it really saved me a lot of hassle. I was able to carry on with my day without fretting about my project. I wasn’t stranded at Home Depot.

So now as I sit here with the foam spread out in front of me, a fresh layer of primer on top, I’m reminded of the good hearts in people. When this project is done, the paint finally dry, I’ll think of them when setting up for a photoshoot. I’ll remember that helpless feeling and then the gratitude will come back, inspiring a positive attitude.

We should start each day upon a backdrop of thanks.

I’m crashing like a tidal wave. I don’t want to be stranded, stranded, stranded.

–Plumb

Smoke

So I’ve been watching all of the hype surrounding the “Papal Conclave.” It sounds so official. I guess it’s something I’ve never really understood about the Catholic church. And still don’t.

It still seems odd that the Pope would resign. But that’s not even the big deal for me. Even if he is old or tired and wants to be done, he couldn’t make it past Easter? Deciding to retire a couple weeks before the holiday is like a producer quitting the day before the presidential election. Now everyone is scrambling to get everything sorted out by Easter. He could have waited. And all this has me thinking. I’m afraid that all of this Pope drama is going to overshadow what is supposed to be a very significant period. All eyes will be on the new pope instead of focusing on the true meaning, the true history of Easter. I get that the pope leads the modern day Catholic church, but Jesus is who it’s really all about. It’s not about which man stands at the balcony and blesses the crowd. It’s not about whether that man will make changes to the system. It’s not about what he wears or what he’s named. All the smoke is getting in the way. It’s about God coming to Earth as a man, living a perfect, sinless life, choosing to sacrifice Himself for the salvation of mankind. It’s about the man on the cross. Who died. More than that, who was raised to life. And is now sitting at the right hand of God. That’s what I’m celebrating.

So the “world’s most famous chimney” can show whatever color smoke it wants. Here’s the list so far:
White: New Pope
Black: No Pope
Red: New Ginger Pope
Green: They haven’t voted anything yet, it’s just St. Patty’s
Blue: the Genie’s coming
Rainbow: Gay Pope
Pink: Woman Pope
No smoke: everyone inside the Sistine Chapel died of smoke inhalation.

All the footage from Rome is making me want to go back. I had a really good time in Rome. It really is a fantastic place full of history. I just remember being in awe of standing in the same place where so much has happened throughout time. I think of all the Biblical accounts of the Romans. I tried to imagine them going about their business on the stone pathways. Conducting meetings in the halls. Looking at remnants of towers it’s hard to imagine what took place. Some day I’ll go back.

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It may sound like I’m jaded and uncaring of the whole Papal Conclave, but I know it matters. I’m praying that God’s will be done. I understand the Pope has the ability to influence millions of people and their beliefs. There could be big changes on the way. I just pray that God would continue to be glorified and more will come to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.

In other news, I’m currently playing jelly belly roulette. I was given a handful and put them in my pocket. I totally forgot about them for the past three hours. Now it’s time to guess their flavors 🙂 White with pink and blue spots–delicious.

Don’t know what the country’s comin’ to but in Rome do as the Romans do. Will you on an evenin’ in Roma?

–Dean Martin

Syrup

The funniest thing I heard today was by far this statement from a co-worker (keep in mind, she was being completely serious): “I think she heard about it from the maple syrup commissioner.”

That’s the beat I want to follow. What’s new syrup man? Breaking news!

Later on that conversation was followed up by another co-worker saying, “That is a lot of syrup. That’s enough to keep Will Ferrell coming back for more.” Only in a newsroom.

In other news, today was a good day. I even rewarded myself with a Mint Shake. Winning. I’m in a much better place than a couple weeks ago. It’s amazing what difference a little time can make. I didn’t get that punched-in-the-gut feeling like before. I was able to smile and move on. I’ve realized there’s nothing I can do, so I shouldn’t be stressing. It’s actually quite a relief. Now I can sit back and trust that whatever comes is meant to be. I’m just excited to see how it all unfolds.

I will remain confident in this: I will see the goodness of the Lord.

The Lord is my Light and Salvation. Whom shall I fear? Of whom shall I be afraid?

–Fellowship Church